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Finding a ‘Gender-Competent’ Therapist for Your Gender-Diverse Child

October 29, 2023

Finding the right therapist for yourself is like dating. There are hits and misses, the process requires patience, and the connection is, well, intimate. Now, try finding a therapist for your child who is not only skilled in kiddo talk but also gender-competent. It is a tall order indeed - but it is possible.

Below are seven tried and true factors you should weigh in on when searching for that perfect therapist for your young one.

Specialized Training & Experience

Dive straight into the therapist's qualifications and expertise. Do they have specialized training in gender identity issues? Ask them about their experiences with clients similar to your child’s age and gender considerations.

Tima / Pexels / If your kids are gender-diverse, finding a gender-competent therapist is your foremost responsibility as a parent.

Knowledge is power, but hands-on experience is golden. So, look for specialty and expertise.

Know Their Approach to Therapy

Therapists are like artists. Everyone has his unique style and methods. Some may lean heavily on cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), while others might be all about play therapy for kids. What is crucial is their approach to gender: do they see it as fluid? Do they use affirming language?

Get to know their style, and see if it syncs with what your child needs.

Safe Space Factor

The environment matters, big time! Check out the therapist’s office or virtual space. Does it feel welcoming? Are there LGBTQ+ affirming posters or literature? Your child should feel comfortable and safe.

Shvets / Pexels / The first thing you would want to ensure is the therapist has specialized training and experience in counseling gender-diverse kids.

In turn, this will enable them to open up and get the most out of the sessions.

Recommendations & Reviews

Word-of-mouth recommendations from trusted friends or family can be incredibly valuable. If someone you know had a positive experience with a gender-competent therapist, that is a fantastic starting point.

Additionally, online reviews and testimonials can give you a broader sense of a therapist’s strengths and areas of expertise.

Open Communication

A great therapist will maintain open lines of communication with you, the parent. They will keep you updated about your child's progress, concerns, and milestones. You are part of the team, after all.

So, while confidentiality between the therapist and your child is vital, there should still be room for broader discussions involving you.

Cotton Bro / Pexels / Before you hire a therapist to counsel your gender-diverse kids, make sure to look up the reviews and recommendations of these professionals.

Inclusivity & Cultural Competence

A gender-competent therapist is awesome. But do not stop there! Look for therapists who are also sensitive to cultural, racial, and religious nuances. We live in a beautifully diverse world.

That is why it is essential that your child feels seen and understood in all aspects of their identity.

Trust Your Gut

Lastly, trust your instincts. Sometimes, a therapist may tick all the boxes on paper, but something might feel off in person. Listen to that inner voice and your child’s feelings too.

A genuine connection between your child and their therapist is key to successful therapy.

Thus, searching for the right therapist, especially one that is gender-competent, can feel like an uphill climb. But remember, it is all about finding that perfect fit. With these seven factors in mind, you are well on your way to securing a supportive, skilled, and understanding therapist for your child.

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